For all the married and single ladies/gentlemen

Written By Coach Joshua

An advice to the men

Men love to be in control. With respect to marriage, most if not all men, love the feeling of being in control in their marriage. Of course, “I am the head of the family” they say quoting the Bible.

However, as a man, understanding the term “wife submission” according to the Bible is very critical. So what does it mean to be the head of a family?

Simply put, HEADSHIP in the context of marriage means LEADERSHIP. Leadership basically means the ability to provide direction. So a leader or the head of the family is a “DIRECTOR“.

Contrary to popular belief, leadership is not LORDSHIP. It’s not about a scenario where we have a MASTER and a SLAVE. Even though the Bible says that the wife should submit to her husband, however, she is not a slave or a servant. She is a Queen.

Oftentimes, many men justify their beastliness by quoting the biblical passage where Sarah referred to Abraham, her husband as lord (see 1 Peter 3:6-7; Genesis 22:5). Fine, one definition of the word ” lord” is master. But when one reads all the story about that couple, one can see that Sarah was actually a Queen to Abraham and not a slave or a servant. Do you remember the lie he had to tell just because of his beautiful wife? (see Genesis 12:17). Does that suggest that Sarah was a slave and that he was a lord?

In marriage, it’s only weak husbands who maltreat their wives. It’s foolish husbands who treat their wives with utter disdain, disregard, disrespect in the public and in the secret. Real husbands pamper their wives like KILODE. They cherish and protect them. You can’t be a good head and your parents, siblings and members of your extended family are harassing, maltreating, or oppressing your wife and you’re doing nothing about it. Common husbands, that shouldn’t happen in your marriage. A good head protects and defends his wife.

As a married man, I don’t play with my wife one bit. She isn’t perfect, yet I treat her like a Queen. With the way I treat her, some people think I have become some sort of “woman wrapper” to her because I can do almost everything humanly possible to make her happy.

Marriage doesn’t enslave the wife. Rather, it enthrones her as the Queen of your heart and home. Men, it’s anti-marriage to allow your own mother run your home as a married man no matter how much you love her. It’s anti-marriage to love your mother above your wife. It’s anti-marriage to be more loyal to your mother than to your wife no matter all the sacrifices she made for you to get you where you’re in life. Should I shock you? There is nothing parents will do for their children that is a favour to their children or special. It’s the right of the children to be given the best of life (see Proverbs 22:6). Your parents suffered so much to train you in the university, your mother had to clean peoples house to pay your school fees, your father took a loan to help you find your feet in life. That’s great. We thank God for all the sacrifices they made for us. However, it’s not a favour from them to us. It’s their parental obligations and our rights as children.

Husbands, please stop all these uninformed arguments. If your parents didn’t do them for you, who should? Another child’s parents or mother? Hear the gospel truth: in marriage, your wife is the best thing that has happened to you, not your mum. Period!

Dear men, when a wife is happy in her marriage she radiates beauty that is beyond her physical looks. Peace of mind and happiness enhance beauty. A happy wife ages slowly. Her youth is renewed yearly. She will look younger for you for a very long time. But when she is unhappy, oppressed, harassed, maltreated, uncared for, unloved, undesirable or disdained, she will age faster or even look far older than her real age.

I understand that despite being married to some of the best husbands on earth, many wives are truly some “piece of work”. They’re very difficult, strong headed, bossy, arrogant, or proud. They can never be submissive to their husbands. Rather, they will square up against him on all fronts just to show her “emancipated” they are. That’s really unfortunate.

Although the husband is the head, the wife is the neck. Of course, the head is on top of everything, yet picture how important the neck is even with lesser visibility than the head. Without the neck the head is useless. That’s how important the wife is in a marriage. Dear husbands, what is your wife to you? Is she a Queen or a slave? Marriage should enhance a wife and not diminish her. Many thanks for reading, commenting, liking and sharing.

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